Thursday, September 17, 2009

not even a tear in the rain

this will be badly punctuated and will be full of terrible grammar, but that reflects the subject. yesterday i saw a man on television declare in scientific calm that the world will definitely end in 5 billion years when the sun will burn up all of its gas and in it's 'death' will consume all planets around it including ours, its already happened, and is happening now elsewhere. so.......what does that change?
well that depends on what you view as changeable. its referred to as 'death' when something ends, we find it so intolerable that something stops without romanticism that we stamp on it the label for the end of our own life, our own punctuation on time. this brings me back to the first line, right now, it seems to me, life has no point, no punctuation.
now that's as gothic as you can get, straight out of a suicide note template. But that's' because of our need for a point or progress. so far we have run around in a circle chasing progress like a tale, and cities, art and society are droplets of murky water being flung from our matted and confused coats. we have created like gods, we have prolonged and we have spread, but we are no closer to knowing the reason for being on this spec of dust than when we started the argument with ourselves. so in our fear of never winning, we've created ways to help us turn away. as time goes on and the immediacy of life becomes clearer we turn away further. life is just time punctuated with distractions from death. so if this is the blueprint of having a point, then life being pointless is not bad, it's great, it's the best bit about it. embraced rather than feared we admit our infancy in the matter and therefore regain innocence, and because innocence cannot be judged by anything, then maybe true happiness might be gained.
so this brings me back to the question 'what is changeable?', if we view the things we measure ourselves by as man made we can therefore change them or give them as much respect as we believe they deserve. But this also results in the realisation that life is just people responding to being alive in their environment. And so maybe this means we have lost the argument, but in that comes a freedom and clarity to truly appreciate the now, and there's enough distraction in that to maybe make us forget we even need punctuation

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